Translate the odd bird

This is me! And you may want to remember this when you ask what I'm thinking!

When I was a kid, just like any other kid, I wanted to be everything: a doctor, a musician, a designer, a journalist, even a writer. It was so easy back then; nobody required anything of you, there was no pressure and you just couldn’t wait to experiment with all the hobbies you could find. Then came the end of high school and there I stood, without a dream job, surrounded by people who seemed to shape that dream while I was preoccupied by teenage dramas and insecurities. That one was one of the hardest years ever. Then I picked one old old love, that was the love for foreign languages. And I said, Law is not for me, Medicine is something I didn’t prepare for in high school, I’m not that big of a drawer, although I’m not a total wreck either, I’m not into these micro-specialties (as I call them), like marketing, PR, social studies, European Studies etc. Well, I would be a Continue reading “Translate the odd bird”

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The beauty of doing things for yourself

fashion, design, blue, dress, hair, inspiration, pretty, makeup, cosmetics, pencil, ink, paint,Yesterday I ran into my …I don’t know if it exists in English, but here, we have a teacher whose primary concern is a class that tha teacher or the head-master picks, every four years. If that class gets in trouble, it will be, first of all that teacher’s fault for not telling the class how to behave better. It’s the teacher that yells at the class or at you if you or the entire class did something bad, it is that teacher which delivers those long speeches about what’s good or bad to you and your classmates and the one lectures the class after something goes wrong. Something like a tutor, but most likely a teacher that teaches to that class as well.

Well, I ran into that person yesterday while at the supermarket and I was like “Don’t be rude, say hello” and I did. Turns out her younger daughter knew who I was,although my contact with her was minimal in the past 7 years, but that woman didn’t have the slightest clue about who I was. It’s like I was a complete stranger to, although I went Christmas caroling to her house every year with my class, I was one of the great students in her class and I kind of thought I would be remembered. Guess what, it Continue reading “The beauty of doing things for yourself”

Does everybody break up this fall?

As usually, coming back from home means, you meet again with everybody. Classmates, classmates that became your friends, classmates that are on train of becoming your friends, all have stories to tell, myself included. Did quite some traveling this summer, and naturally, at my age, I find myself often caught between the desire of doing my job (that is, going to classes, for now) and grabbing a backpack and taking a long leap of absence, for as long as my conscience would allow me to skip what’s due for me now, that is my final exam, my final paper and ultimately that wonderful piece of paper that tells me I am superior to someone who didn’t go to college, but God knows how or when. Reasons to almost freak out.

But going back to stories from our holiday. I am at an age, I find, when slowly everybody settles down with somebody. I don’t mean in a “moving-in-together-soon-getting-married” sort of way, but rather, I find myself looking around me while waiting for a class to begin and I see girls hanging out with boys, then gradually, a girl kisses one of the boys she’s with in the first situation, then boom, guess what? they have been together for four years now and yeah, they are getting married …kind of settling down situation. I have classmates that have been in a relationship with their significant other for more than 3 years, I have classmates that already got married. Yesterday I saw an old room-mate of mine that just got married and is pregnant with her first baby, at 21. You think it’s crazy, but it’s happening. This is the time when you have all the fun in the world on the one hand, but secretly look for someone to settle with, a secret wish, on the other hand.

Don’t get yourself fooled, though, cause it’s not just fun and games. What got me thinking these past few days, apart from my pregnant ex-room mate, is the number or people that actually break up this time of the year. It makes me sad just to think about it. You spend an year seeing people go in relationships on facebook, growing every day and then there’s that message from your friend that says “you know, me and my boyfriend are a done deal”. It’s troubling when you truly care about someone’s well being, even though I am in a relationship, per se.

I often find myself in an awkward position, after yet another friend breaking up with their significant other. Wow, you were so amazing, you seemed to get along just fine, like you had the world at your feet and then baaam, it’s over. She is crying, he is mad somewhere, everything is messy and certain topics become awkward topics, just because in a way, it’s cruel to talk about your personal life with someone who just had theirs shattered to tiny tiny pieces. At least that’s how I see it, some other girls would not stop blabbing about their awesome boyfriend, awesome life, awesome everything. Wanted to punch some of those specimens in the face once or twice in the past, so I know from experience that I don’t want to become that queen bee, but a queen bee that is supportive. How? I haven’t figured it out yet. I would rather be alone after breaking up, rather than have anybody ask me everything to the smallest detail I don’t want to share cause it’s a personal, painful detail. Some like to spill everything to the smallest detail, like it is some sort of retribution for every painful tear that crossed the cheek and every time you waited for that stupid phone to ring, and to be his name on the screen, so you could hear his voice and he would say all those nice things and how truly sorry he is and how he wants you back into his life. But that never happens, cause once the girl is out of a relationship, it’s like you slighted your ex’s ego forever. No way you are going back to what you had ever again. And as soon as you realize what I just said, it’s like taking a really awful tasting pill: it tastes like crap while it’s on your tongue, but after you swallow it, there will soon be no trace of it ever entering your mouth.

Making someone realize that is hard and painful for the person, so most of the time I hide under the “It’s probably none of my business sign” and tackle but the surface of the problem, hoping that they are going to come to my same conclusion on their own, just like I do it. Plus, saying just the right thing is difficult sometimes, cause sometimes there are no friends’ words curing you better than a sad song.

Maybe it’s just me, but if it’s not, then tell me about how you dealt with this idea of your friend’s breakup and how it affected your relationship with her. Maybe you’ll teach me some tips, you never know.

Best friends or believing in the Tooth Fairy?

I started watching a new series yesterday, The Mindy project  and just like in any other series that centers on a heroine, and not a hero, there is this classic cliché of the heroine having a best friend with whom she shares everything. It was not the only series in which I saw this going on, frankly, I can’t find a series in which the heroine is best-friend-less. And I thought…is it really that good in real life and I am just missing out on the fun? Everyone has their girl soulmate?
Continue reading “Best friends or believing in the Tooth Fairy?”

Today I like: Sainee Parinoush – The Book of Fate

I found this book in newsletters from Romanian online booksellers about a year ago, but never truly got to reading it, because most of the time I had doubts about whether the book is worth reading or not. I find myself often running into crappy books that are simply too strange to be readable from one cover to the other. I was amazed when I realized that before getting the Game of Thrones collection from my boyfriend, I haven’t bought any books for pleasure in over two years.  Now I would rather browse the internet ’till the end of time, looking for a free epub version of the books I would be tempted to read. At least there are no hard feelings if the book is Continue reading “Today I like: Sainee Parinoush – The Book of Fate”

On graduation. Premature thoughts.

 

There are some days in which things look gloomy, days in which everything seems grey and all I’m supposed to do doesn’t happen in just a day. There are days in which I want to succeed in just a day, to know exactly what is going to happen, step by step, so I could do it better when I am supposed to do it. What I sometimes forget is that everything that is life altering never happens when I plan it. These are the events that have a way of their own, that are worth remembering and worth living, the things I know deep down that are going to make my life memorable. But don’t we all sometimes want to just Continue reading “On graduation. Premature thoughts.”